Window into Wipfli

Striving for work-life balance is a recipe for frustration. Instead, aim for “sway.”

By Rebekah Gardner, chief growth officer, Wipfli Advisory LLC

I’ve long struggled with the current notion of work-life balance we’ve all been sold: That somehow, our work and personal lives should be evenly split in half. In my experience, this struggle to achieve “balance” often creates frustration for people because our workloads are rarely balanced or perfectly predictable.

Culturally, it’s been more accepted for people who have kids to move between professional and personal obligations to achieve this so-called balance. But I’ve learned over the course of my professional journey that sometimes we overlook the fact that people without kids have personal priorities that are equally important to them.

The typical work culture hasn’t always been great at allowing all team members to move between personal and professional lives, whether they have kids or not. This has been a recipe for frustration for many, me included.

What is work-life sway?

I began to think about a more sustainable model than work-life balance. Instead of achieving balance, I wanted my team members and me to be as present as possible in the spaces we chose to be in. I call it work-life sway.

Some weeks and some months will be more heavily weighted toward being heads down and achieving professionally. Then there are times when we are more available for things outside of work. It’s allowing ourselves to sway back and forth without constantly feeling like we are short-changing other aspects of ourselves that are important.

Adopting this new perspective has eased much of the stress I felt as a single working mother. Whether I’m having dinner with colleagues or sitting in a boardroom, I keep my phone visible and face up on the table. That way, the school, coaches or my children can always reach me, and those around me understand the reason for my phone’s presence. It’s not about being rude — it’s about maintaining influence and accessibility.

This sway means I won’t answer my phone in the boardroom if my best friend calls to talk about the trip we’re planning. It does mean that when I am at the gym and my watch notifies me that our CEO is calling, I will respond if something needs my immediate attention. It’s sway. I get to take care of myself and keep in touch. It also means that when I am on a much-needed vacation or long weekend away, my team knows I am only just a text message away. It’s sway.

As leaders, it’s important to recognize that sway is good for business. It drives higher team member engagement, which drives higher client satisfaction over the long haul. I empower my teams to engage in the pursuits that are important to them, but they acknowledge that sway can’t come at the expense of our ability to deliver on our mission for our clients.

How to foster sway

Over the years, it’s been critical to make time for coaching, mentoring and therapy. Mom guilt can be very real and sometimes you need to work that out with a professional. I’ve also developed a personal “board of directors,” a group of people, mostly other female executives, built up over the years from different industries. I’ll call or meet with them to talk through professional challenges and questions. I bounce ideas off of them, and they hold me accountable. Their “outsider” perspective keeps me grounded. And I do the same for them.

I’ve learned how to manage my own personal energy — my sway — very closely. I am an introvert by nature, so making time for quiet rest is incredibly important to my ability to show up for my people each day.

Your sway might not look like the person you’re working next to, and that’s exactly as it should be. How you achieve success is your responsibility. Setting boundaries is your responsibility. But remember that boundaries aren’t just about keeping the junk out. It’s also about keeping the stuff you want in your life at the forefront.

As chief growth officer at Wipfli, my responsibility is to set a clear vision of success for the firm. Consistently communicating and modeling that personal success matters just as much. That means supporting various paths to achieving it. The balance is achieved over a long period of time, and the benefits are invaluable.

My teams need to take their vacation days, go to the gym, climb mountains or sit at home and do absolutely nothing, take their children to doctor appointments, do the college move-ins or knit sweaters for days on end — and then come back ready to take on the world of Wipfli.

The sway we have enabled allows us to do that, and I hope we will all think about making that possible for each other.